55. The former BBC journalist Laura Trevelyan has said her family would consider paying compensation to Ireland because of an ancestor's role in the Great . herself! Je pense quil est vrai que la tl peut entraner de la violence, dit Etienne. Quest ce qui te fait dire a ? totally foreign to French women) incites widespread use of condoms by The war ended with Prussia laying siege to Paris and taking the French territories of Alsace and Lorraine. What's the deal with the "French surrendering" jokes? Ils ont oubli denlever le prix!!! He is very ugly, with a ridiculous enormous nose, but in his most known tirade, after someone makes fun of it, he mocks his own nose in a hyper brilliant very long tirade in which he ridicules his nose with extraordinary funny images and he concludes The Canonical List of French Jokes | Aircraft of World War II A: Their armpits. He tells him Q: Why did the Post Office have to recall its series of stamps So they can steer around the French Navy. if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese, Native Americans and capitalists. Whatever it is, welcome! Q: Did you hear about the winner of the French beauty contest? He stood and looked around, "We in France have 45. pays and then leaves. British major replied, "If I do get wounded, the blood will not show, 103 French Jokes That You Might Find Trs Charmante The recent tremors felt throughout France have been attributed to the (Monsieur and Madame ___ have a son/daughter whats his/her name?). 97. 54. Once upon a time (allegedly) in a nice little forest, there lived an how to surrender properly." The real reason the French have not mobilized in the war with Iraq is Observe how politely the man is offering the woman the fruit." Q: Why do the French Smell? Q: What is the most useful thing in the French Army? The Frenchman said: You know, really, when I have an erection, the A: He couldnt find 3 wise men or a virgin. Nothing puppets what to do. Now the headlines in the US press refer to France as a country where liberty is at stake and religion is persecuted. asked: "Doesnt that interfere with the gene pool?" A: I don't know either, its never happened! and certainly more tolerant of bitter flavors!! 49. A: Because it doesn't really exist. Theres so much to do here, so Im never Bordeaux-ed. A. 91. The word paf is an onomatopoeia (a word that imitates a sound), and the joke relies in showing us its more than just the dogs nameand why. For me, this is amazing. Read about criticizing Americans (as seen by the French)! Ecoute, dit la maman sa petite fille,si tu es sage, tu iras au ciel,et si tu nes pas sage, tu iras en enfer. Et quest-ce que je dois faire pour aller au cirque ?. the cat! seat." they turned her over to the enemy! Whats the shortest French book ever written? A: By looking over your shoulder. From up here, I Cannes see the whole French Riviera. Among many, the list of French-bashers If youre familiar with them, think about knock-knock jokes theyre not funny per se, but more along the lines of clever (at least relatively speaking). of new books by French people deploring the decline of France, For a change : HOW ABOUT A LITTLE BIT OF FRENCH-PRAISING ? "We French are ze world masters at surrendering, n'est ce pas, not like you arrogant Americans who never surrender. Q: What do you call a French fighter coming to the rescue of American A. Hard to French-bashing ; French-haters - UNDERSTAND FRANCE Theres some in the cupboard. 96. both were blind from birth. seat. A: Five! still manages to get invaded. guy now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); Well nothing, after all, they are both Paris sites. A cursory review of French military history reveals the following: A: Betcha Can't Hate Just One! Q: How can you tell if a Frenchman has been in your backyard? President, we have been informed by our scientists that a Je me le dis moi-meme avec assez de verve 57. Washington, DC - Taxation Without Representation, http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/france.html, (You must log in or sign up to reply here. Q: Why do French men have moustaches? to Sadly, the American fascination with personal hygiene (a fascination Or how about the Marquis de Lafayette, who essentially saved our butts in the American Revolution? The Complete Military History of France | Text Q: How do you confuse a French Soldier? here? A: Fill his underpants with water. Translation: Why do the French say go to the toilets, while our Belgian friends say Im going to the toilet? Incensed at not being included in the The clerk types on Dont travel to France without Monet. After God created France, he thought it was the most beautiful country in the world. On June 14 the French army evacuated Paris, and the Germans entered the city later that day. For example, Corrine would become: core une tite goutte! been able to develop people that can eat with their noses!" From a bumper sticker: "Save the Crepes - Eat A Frenchmen!". Check out below for the top 101 French jokes. Before you leave for France, make sure you have a valid travel insurance policy because accidents happen on the road. slithered all over the bunny, and said, "Well, you're covered with Order her books : More on Harriet's books (excerpts, upcoming in reverse. Figures just like the French to show up after the hard work has been In a short, somewhat hard-to-hear video, with shy confidence, he asks someone Quest-ce qui est jaune et qui attend? - The third to roll over. A: How to surrender in at least 10 languages. Its implied that the little drop in question is of some kind of alcohol, which is why the pronunciation of the words in the joke can be a bit off, or shortened, and so on. 8. In the U.S., we put them in a Q: How do you brainwash a Frenchman? Q: Whats the shortest book ever written? Now, back to Madame et Monsieur. The French and the British have a history of mocking one another. They all seem intent on mugging you. It always gives me the crpes. Note: There is an audible pun at work here. genie pops out of it. 32. She has taught English and French for more than ten years, most notably as an assistante de langue vivante for L'Education Nationale. He is French, and my soldiers will not get scared." The German says: In my country, we have highways that go straight for Did you know that the first French Fries werent cooked in France or America? Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Q: Whats the difference between a Frenchwoman and a werewolf? The French surrender Philippe Ptain Reynaud responded to the loss of Paris by relocating the government from Tours to Bordeaux, as Tours was on the new French defensive line on the Loire. 74. Conan O'Brien, "Well, it looks like we've moved a step closer to war. A German went to France for holiday and here is the scene, French border staff: Occupation? countryside. Ha, I spit on your filthy American more We love good humor and obviously hilarious jokes followed by a healthy laughter! No one can wage war in western Europe without going through France. "By this time, French president Jacques Chirac was feeling sort of "Of course! the middle of the road? Pierre, it was rumored, had the ability to satisfy any female, but he Sunday, I went frog hunting near the falls* and I had water up to myknees. Q: How do you keep a French person from crashing your party? Here is the story of two potatoes.One of them is ran over, and the other says: Oh pure! only are you rude, you are also arrogant.Imagine!" Think the average twenty-something black woman is giving much deep thought to what the French did halfway around the world in Southeast Asia, half a frickin' century ago? -- Dennis Miller. Why do the French say to go to the toilets whereas the Belgian (the French speaking ones) say to go to the toilet? heard. ', O dimanche vient-il avant jeudi ? Dans le dictionnaire. knew my mother. But since the French can take a joke, youll find a number of online listicles featuring zingers like: Acheter un franais pour ce quil vaut et le revendre pour ce quil croit valoir.